Miss L.C.

  We all have heard that saying “Don’t take anyone or anything for granted because tomorrow isn’t promised”. I have learned this first hand.

  15 years ago today my friend Manuel passed away. I remember all of this like it was just yesterday. I remember getting that phone call to let me know that he was in the hospital. I couldn’t believe it!! I had pushed myself away from him because of a petty argument (I was only 15 at the time).  I remember going to the hospital and not being able to go into the room, I could only see him from the glass. He had been in a car accident and had severe head trauma and was in a coma. My best friend was laying there helpless and there was nothing I could do. I remember his aunt sneaking me into his room so I can see him, so I can hold his hand and finally say sorry for being such a dumb kid. I hated myself for the simple fact that he tried to reach out to me and make things right but I just didn’t want to give in. I sat there and cried and apologized and the moment I did that all the alarms in his room went off. I remember going home that day and telling my grandma about it and she told it happened because he heard me and forgave me. I spent numerous days and nights in the hospital with his family and our friends praying that he would wake up. That he would be okay again.

  I went everyday and then finally one night I told I just wanted to stay home. The next day I went to school, like I always had but then everything changed. My mom came to my school and I knew at that very moment Manuel was gone. I was upset at myself because I never had apologized, I was upset because I didn’t go the night before, I was upset because my best friend was gone. How could God take him away from his family and friends? I just didn’t get it. I cried to my grandma and told her to make God bring him back and she explained to me that God needed an angel and chose him.

  Manuel passed away and he was buried and the day he died a little piece of me went with him. I learned to forgive and to forget. I finally understood what my mom and grandma had always told me: Don’t go to bed upset with someone because either them or you may not wake up to the next day ,remember to tell the ones you love that you love them, never ever take anyone for granted and most importantly remember that we are on borrowed time, God may want it back at anytime.

 For 15 years I have kept all of this bottled up inside of me and even though it has been 15 years there isn’t a day that goes by that I don’t miss my best friend and I catch myself sometimes sitting and wondering what things would be like if he was still here. What I wouldn’t give for one more day!!!

I really think I work myself up over nothing some times. I was so ready yesterday to just give up on everything that I have worked so hard to achieve. I felt overwhelmed and alone. Didn’t feel like turning to anyone since each of us have our own things to worry about. As I drove to school yesterday all I could think if was how easy it would be to just give up. I kept telling myself that it was fine do so and I would be okay with. Then it hit me!! I wasn’t raised where things were handed to my mom showed me at a very early age that you had to work for things that you wanted. Everyone struggles to get where they want to be, some of us will struggle a little more than others. I struggled to graduate high school and my struggle will continue until I am finish school, and have the career I have always dreamt about. I will not give up!!